Hilarious and extravagant excuses from a child to his teacher about why he was late for school. But... what if they weren't excuses?

It all started when giant ants stole the protagonist's breakfast, then he was attacked by ninjas and a giant gorilla. Later, he becomes very small or very big and ends up having breakfast with Little Red Riding Hood. And so unfold the amazing adventures that a child recounts to justify why he was late for school. Are they all excuses or is there an even more convoluted explanation for why the protagonist didn't arrive on time?